I would rather not
Be here,
On the other side
Of Ache,
Forsaking all my real
Beliefs for
Baby,
One last kiss.
______________________

The spiral starts
On Saturday.
It cuts away

All delusions

That carry me through the week.

___________________________

Leave her floating
In her dreams.
It wouldn't be unseemly
To never, ever wake her.
Think of all the lives you'll live
Without that little kiss.

I know a guy... let's call him Sunshine.

Sunshine was on the spectrum. That is, Sunshine was affected by autism spectrum disorder, but this isn't about that.

Somewhere is Sunshine's life some helpful soul decided to color code each day of the week. On Mondays, we wore red clothes, drank from the red cup, used the red toothbrush and so forth. Tuesday, green. Wenesday, blue. Thursday, yellow. Friday, black. Saturday, white. Sunday, gray. All was well in Sunshine's world. Until the day that Sunshine started to experience seizures. He would often drop without warning, loose consciousness. When he woke up, he would need to change his clothes. He did this several times in a day.

The people around Sunshine tried very hard to keep up with his laundy needs, but frankly they, like us all are only human. So they would bring Sunshine gray clothes on Wenesday.

"Wenesday," he would tell them, "Is for B-LOOO. "

The people would explain to Sunshine that yes, they knew that, but they were all out of blue clothes.

And so the struggle would begin.

Who is to say we are not all exactly like Sunshine? The tools we use to help us... become the walls we use to contain us, the traps that we then have to work to break free from.

What happened to Sunshine?

His walls got tighter and tighter until he couldn't come out at all.

See that it doesn't happen to you.

I work in a grade school in a classroom especially for children with disabilities who, for some reason are not able to be mainstreamed. I love my job. There is nothing in this world like feeling satisfied with the job you do.

There is nothing a person can do to turn me off to them quite as much as when they say something like " Oh, you are so wonderful. You must be really special indeed to work in a field like that". It makes me want to punch them in the face. I don't earn any hero coins for working there and I wouldn't want them. I am honored everyday with every smile, every word, every expression. Frankly, the praise of the 'normal' people is ... worthless to me.

Even the best of people don't get it. You can go to church, do community service, feed the poor... whatever. I think the important thing to remember is once you treat someone as 'different' from you... you have lost the cosmic fight. We are all made of the same stuff. My high school chemistry teacher taught me that (thank you, Mr Bobeck) and it stuck. We are all made up of water, elements (stardust) and energy. This goes for all races, colors, sexual persuasions and disabilities. We are all the same. We are all interwoven. So when you dishonor someone by treating them as different, no matter your intentions, you dishonor YOUR self.

We are all equal. We are all the same. That is the big lesson for me this year.